Rocking citrine crystal next to my heart, with the
self-besmirched crooked homemade yin yang tattoo done stuck and poke decades
ago, angled too oblong for external views but perfectly round from my eyeballs
looking down. Rocking citrine crystal for prosperity, constantly struggling
against the riptide, like my whole life, and generally don’t think about it
because it feels natural normal nothing extraordinary, but the more I know
people with more, the more I realize how different how I am is from how others
are. Wouldn’t change none of the past, because that path got me here, but damn
if I could have it where I wasn’t fighting so hard every damn week in the
future, I’d do that shit in a heartbeat. And yet at the same time can’t ever be
co-opted by the capital dreams of escape from suffering without remembering the
fact that nothing makes you special for being blessed to escape the struggle,
and there’s plenty of folks left behind in the riptide still struggling, and I’d
rather have the whole carnival game cancelled than me win the big stuffed
animal finally.
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