RAVEN MACK is a mystic poet-philosopher-artist of the Greater Appalachian unorthodox tradition. He does have an amazing PATREON, but also *normal* ARTIST WEBSITE too.

Wednesday, June 20

MNZ: Lindy's Pro Football 2007 Preview

Man, I thought this shit didn't usually come out till first week of July, but every year it moves further and further ahead. Still, I can't resist snatching a copy as soon as it comes out, because pro basketball is sleeping pills and baseball is for old child molesters with handlebar mustaches to get all mathematical and shit and read numbers all day long. I actually played a fantasy baseball league this year and that shit is stupid, and frustrating, and there's nothing worse than being frustrated by something you think is really beneath you to even be doing in the first place. That's why I think I'm either gonna just waive all my players and have no players, or trade them for all black players in honor of Gary Sheffield.
Anyways, the Lindy's annual is my preferred printed guide to the impending NFL season, and I'll read over the rosters and columns and look at dumb shit like which team has the most undrafted free agents and which team has the most of its own draft picks and which team has the most non-major college players and all that junk. I used to compile all-star teams of the players who were most awesome, who sucked the most, who had the funniest names, longest tenure on one team, all that type of shit, and I might do it again, even though I've come across other internerdz who do shit like punter's formulas and ratings systems for best offensive guards that make me leery of getting all dorked up. To my credit, being like "Haha, Jericho Cotchery sounds like a Biblical crime" is way less nerdtellectual than creating a formula to rank who the best punters are because the already in place system of net yards just isn't truedat enough is.
Anyways, Redskins are off to a great start, drafting a player they really didn't need with their only draft pick, and now he got shot in the dick during paintball. I really really really hope Dan Snyder's heliocopter crash lands upside down in an alligator pit soon enough. (Oh yeah, Dan Snyder just bought Dick Clark apparently.)

No comments: