RAVEN MACK is a mystic poet-philosopher-artist of the Greater Appalachian unorthodox tradition. He does have an amazing PATREON, but also *normal* ARTIST WEBSITE too.
Showing posts with label God needed a Driver. Show all posts
Showing posts with label God needed a Driver. Show all posts

Friday, April 12

SONG OF THE DAY: Shu Ba Da Dum Ma Ma Ma Ma (kudzu’d)


[A critical micro-analysis of the final chase scene from White Lightning, as submitted to The University of Universal Magnetics by Raven Mack, as part of my thesis on Southern Gothicc Futurism.]
White Lightning came out in the summer of 1973, and was part of a ‘70s genre of white lower class antihero movies. Burt Reynolds was in his initial wave of stardom after the success of Deliverance the year before, and played a former moonshine runner who was seeking vengeance in the murder of his brother, killed by local police. Placed alongside current politics, the movie stands in sharp contrast to today’s performative outlaw imagery that many white men have purchased as their identity, that somehow makes the dissonant alignment of “outlaw” with “backing the blue”, or supporting law enforcement. Reynolds’ character, Gator McKlusky, is a true outlaw, and has the prison record to show for it. Gator uses federal agents, under the guise of being a cooperative witness, to get a souped up Ford Custom 500, and eventually lures the corrupt sheriff, played by Ned Beatty, into a climactic car chase. Knowing every back road to the mile, despite his time away in prison, McKlusky is able to slowly lure the sheriff to going over an embankment and drowning in the river. In post-MAGA crime-fearing politics, the notion of killing a policeman would be never be seen in good light, much celebrated as a heroic victory, but White Lightning lays out the tale to our antihero’s benefit.
All media is propaganda of some sort, attuned to the creator’s biases, whether consciously or unconsciously. Rarely these days do we see underclass heroes who are positioned against corrupt authorities that are realistic and present day, thus easily translatable to real life corruption. It’s more often than not filtered through science fiction, against technological overreach or distant corrupt systems of power that are more globalized than localized. But the reality of the American experience is that those of us who suffer abuses at the hands of an ever-expanding police state do so at the localized level. It’s refreshing to see a folkloric antihero succeeding against the type of corrupt county sheriff that still very much exists in far more rural American counties than the average digitally news attuned brain could comprehend. And with local journalism pretty much gutted by venture capitalism and the movement to digital news sources over the past couple decades, any stories of local corruption are mostly word-of-mouth.
The end of White Lightning is a memorial parade for the dead sheriff, which Gator watches before driving off into the sunset. He didn’t actually cooperate with the feds, remaining true to his outlaw nature as a former moonshiner. The local people, unaware of the reality behind the scenes, still celebrated the sheriff, believing he stood for law and order in a decent way. These would be the MAGA people today, who somehow are the political marks standing alongside the parade route, waving flags for a corrupted leader, yet they believe in their minds, due to the propaganda they consume, that they are the Gator McKlusky, and antihero. It makes no logical sense. But in a world where the propaganda’s biases are far more pronounced, yet denied to an even greater extent, it’s hard to avoid. We’ve been culturally conditioned to think up is down, wrong is right, and openly corrupt leadership is a savior from corruption. We need more Gators, but all we seem to be served up are more flag-waving extras jockeying for digital position to watch the parade march by.

Tuesday, September 5

SONG OF THE DAY: Sugar Free (Deo/Super Dance Mix)


More vehicles should have mixers in them, because this is a great song for a 5 month drive time, and you could loop that beat from the first 30 seconds or so for at least two weeks. Then loop the part right after that where the hook is teased before the verse starts, and loop that for a week and a half, then drop it back to the beginning for a few hours, before finally rocking into the first verse, somewhere around the fourth or fifth week of your drive. I’m not big on cyborg bullshit, but if they gave me a mind mixer, I’d jump at that chance. The problem with most of our delusional cyborg dreams is they’re based on implants in the brain, which isn’t even where the mind is, ignoring the heart completely, so you’re gonna have a bunch of dumbasses running around with these brain implants, thinking things into the microchips with their poisoned ass brain thoughts. The folly of men, thinking they know what they know when they don’t know shit (and never have).

Monday, April 25

SONG OF THE DAY: Driving My Life Away (slurred & blurred)


Another classic slowed down to through the slurred and blurred stylings of dj_brilliant (you have to spell it like that with the underscore or you end up referring to somebody else). On weeks where my youngest is with me, since her official address is with her mom the next county over, I have to drive like 2.5-3 hours a day, to get her to and from school or practice, and damn man, that shit gets tiring as fuck. That’s way too much time just in a fuckin’ car. So I feel this song. For more information on dj_brilliant, consult your local search bar.

Friday, November 26

TH3M TH4T'S B0RN T0 D3NT GV4RDR41LS...


them that’s born to dent guardrails 
make games of self-destruction - 
stubbornly prove survival 

Thursday, August 19

Friday, June 25

SONG OF THE DAY: A Dan Den

 

If you seen a fucked up looking dude in overalls with no shirt riding around in a Toyota Corolla anywhere between Delaware and South Carolina, blasting this while eating fried chicken thighs, all the windows down, looking sexy and greasy as hell, that was me. You shoulda hollered.

Thursday, June 24

Wednesday, May 5

SONG OF THE DAY: Quicksand

 

Despite all the historical racism and national geopolitics which seems somewhat Jesse Helmsesque still, Carolina is a whole vibe. It’s fucked up too, because there’s no real identifier of that whole vibe (which I’d dare say is its own culture), but it’s where the edges of New York influence and Dirty South ambiance bleed together, perhaps at the margins of both. I grew up in southside Virginia, which feels far more like Carolina than the more known geopolitical parts of Virgina (northern Virginia’s affluent DC suburbs and Hampton Roads military industrial complex of a whole bunch of lives spread wide across multiple cities). As a young delinquent, we were at first always more apt to roll up to Richmond than south, because those artificial borders create big psychic walls. But as I got older, I’ve come to see how that whole Piedmont Carolina vibe is steeped from the same sludge that I was in southside Virginia. And with the steady influx and influence of migration from further south, turning large parts into Carolina del Norte, it’s gotten even more Southern Gothicc Futurist. You might just zip through on the interstate, or skirt through the edges trying to get to Charlotte or the OBX, but if you slow down and slide in deeper, you’re gonna experience a beautiful place with a unique vibe. I love that shit, and with the weather turning warm, it’s got me daydreaming of meandering cruises through that whole area, windows down and AC running on high, at the same damn time because fuck it, blasting Morray’s “Quicksand” and trying to decide if I wanna get chicken gizzards from the gas station deli or pupusas from the back of the tienda. Can I do a gizzards/livers combo? And get two lorocco pupusas too? Damn, true and living Southern Gothicc Futurism is already here, and it’s a glorious goddamn thing.

Monday, March 11

Tuesday, February 13

Sunday, August 6

Tuesday, July 5

late model pick-up truck kept
clean enough to remain proud,
not just jacked for no reason

Monday, August 15

d r t z x

racing fuel smells chemical
yet earthy, reminds me of
roxboro trips with ricky

Saturday, September 11

Sunday, December 20

Budweiser


AFFORDABILITY: It is Budweiser, so in the sense of cheapest beer alive, it is not affordable at all; yet is cheaper than about half the good beers out there. I will never for the life of me understand how Budweiser, being it is cheap ass swill beer, can charge as much for a 12-pack as many on-sale quality beers with pop tops instead of twist-off action. Still, I bought a pair of tall cans with bright red motifs that were cheap as fuck compared to certain aspects of the beer shelf. So I cannot complain that Budweiser is too expensive, especially since my beer tastes have morphed into thinking Yuengling is the cheapest beer I will drank. But still, there is a divide between “cheap” beer and “good” beer, like any good hippie girl will explain to you when there is no weed to be smoked through the bong her friend who is taking a glass blowing class at the community college, and Budweiser is the most expensive “cheap” beer there is, although I know in its own head it likes to pretend it’s the cheapest “good” beer available on the open market. But come on, dudes in trademarked camouflage patterned clothes are never buying actual good beer, so stop fronting. 2 out of 5.
DESTROYABILITY: There is a long history in my lifetime of drinking the Budweiser, especially during the early days of dating my wife where we’d split an 18-pack while drinking and driving our way out of the Richmond city limits to where you could see the stars shine and feel your lifeline. But there is a thing about the rice brewing technique that makes for an upset intestinal fortitude the next day, and it brings upon a hungover feeling that most beers would never bring. But, unfortunately, if you go to a public event, hockey game or arena concert or whatever, you’ll have to go out of your way to drink something other than the Budweiser. It is their gangsta ass grip on American capitalism. Thus, I could never support them wholeheartedly, even half-heartedly. And it makes it impossible to drank their beer fast enough to confuse my brain with bloodstream-based delusions. I will fight no more forever. 1 out of 5.
LABEL AESTHETIC: I bought two tall cans of Budweiser, and one thing I have to give Bud credit for, at least with their main brand, is they keep it fresh. And yet they always have aspects of that basic well-known Budweiser beer can motif. This one is bright red, with the cursive Budweiser logo, and that Anheuser-Busch logo thing with the detailed blue nonsense like on the back side of a deck of cards. From when I was collecting 12-pack boxes, where most beers would hold the same packaging for years, some never changing it, Budweiser would refresh their packaging every couple of months, including special seasonal ones. Seems like since they got bought by the Euros, they've become more concerned with introducing a bunch of wacky side flavors of beer, which I don't understand, but they keep the Budweiser cans fresh-looking. Dare I say, this may be one of the pimpest looking tall cans around, like an NFL team having an alternate dark jersey for a Monday night game, since it's very different from regular Bud cans but very much like it. 5 out of 5.
CORPORATE MASTER: You know their steez... Budweiser used to use Dale Earnhardt Jr. and Willie Nelson to import white slaves from Russia through Israel into criminal prostitution rings based in the West Indies. A dime of every dollar you give to Budweiser's Anhitler-George W. Bush overlords is a dime towards the terminal cancer you will be secretly injected with while voluntarily getting a swine flu vaccination. They were the ones that killed William B. Cooper and suicided Hunter S. Thompson because he was about to expose the Finders child molestation cult from Florida that was creating blogospheric Republican monarch slave sensations and was involved in the Jon-Benet Ramsey sexual assault/murder. And they brew Budweiser beer, and there you sit, gladly drinking that bullshit, toasting your own impending demise. Oh [ ], why can't you hold more sway over these misguided sheep? 0 out of 5.
OVERALL AMBIANCE: Hey, there is nothing that feels terrible about drinking the Budweiser. It is like voting Republican for President and the guy wins and you are stoked because you did very normal things and were very predictably successful in doing so. You can drink the Budweiser and it is recognizeable and it is normal and it will get you drunk and you will feel American as fuck. Hard to believe only a few short years ago that this was actually still an American beer and Dale Jr. was driving the Budweiser 8 and we hated Arabs and refinanced our homes to get a fat nut to blow on a boat. Now look at us. Yet those capitalist pig German fucks still expect us to not only suck down our Budweiser and traditionally gluttonous American paces, but they're throwing in all this American Ale Golden Wheat Lime Ale bullshit. 2 out of 5.
TOTAL RATING: 2 STARS!

Thursday, September 17

Stella Artois


AFFORDABILITY: The Stella Artois ain't the cheapest beer around, but we were having visitations from my wife's oldest sister and her fam, and they have money, so I was high rolling it, at least in my mind. Plus, being on anti-can beer kick, the Stella Artois, in 12-pack boxes, was as cheap as any for-real good beer, although sixers were in my "ahem... ahem... I guess I'll get some Yuenglings" range. 3 out of 5. Man, my standards have really switched up since I ain't such an alcoholic who needs to be elbow deep into a 12-pack by 11 pm.
DESTROYABILITY: First night I drank it was in the 24 oz. variety, and mixed in with a tall can of the Kirin Ichiban shit, and I've been eating less and sleeping less and working harder, and that tag team combo of beers put me on tilt for real. Since then, I drank some a couple more nights (this is a long term test), and it gave me the proper tilt on those nights as well, once in some unlounging dude's house, and the other sitting next to an early fall/late summer bonfire underneath a nearly full moon. Motherfuckin' propers to you Ms. Stella Artooey. 5 out of 5.
LABEL AESTHETIC: A nice Euro label with red and white prominent and plenty of gold flash. Not gold like Lil Flip's teeth, but classy gold like an Estonian boxer's fillings. Plus Euro words here and there for a touch of international flair, and the upper label wraps over top the blank bottle cap. Most beers, if they want to be tight, spend money for stupid sayings on the bottle caps and spirals and shit like that. Stella Artimissy kicks it with a simple blank cap and extra printed paper, which is probably cheaper, and looks different. More motherfuckin' propers to you Ms. Stella Artooey. 6 out of 5.
CORPORATE MASTER: I think they bought Budweiser didn't they, right before the All American Ale came out back when that big Frankenstein looking dude from Saturday Night Live was doing their commercials? If they did, they can't be that great a corporation for finding a reason to over-profit from an already overprofitable brand. You know, none of this would've happened - Budweiser owned by the Belgiese or Stella Artois at my local Food Lion or 9/11 or nothing - if Dale Earnhardt hadn't died. 2 out of 5.
OVERALL AMBIANCE: I will not front, the Stella Artois has become my favorite beer. I had at some point mistakenly prejudged it as some richboy faggot nonsense, and I can’t even remember why. Maybe somebody unlounging I knew was drinking it or pimping it or something. I can tell you that if I had the money flow going on, this would be my main beer right now, because it gives you a good healthy buzz, feels good in your hand, and the paper wraps on top give you something that occupies nervous fidgeting, and reminds me personally of the bottle’s potential molotov cocktail options. In fact, I wish I had about 11 of these right now and I’d stay up all night listening to Willie Nelson records in my camper, typing nonsense into a cheap ass and virus infected laptop. 12 out of 5.
TOTAL RATING: 5 & 3/5 STARS!