Got some bad news at the doctor yesterday, though my doctor is just sitting underneath the biggest birch tree back in the woods behind the house. But my labs came back and my fuckitallism levels are way too high, and I need to bring them down. Historically, this usually triggers a burning bridges mentality in my people, and when my fuckitallism levels are like this, I tend to lead towards saying unhelpful things to people who lack any sort of skin to absorb such comments. And more often than not, them folks usually got more control over Things (the larger organized society type Things, not magical unseen things), and even though they lack the heart to actually let their tongue speak their thoughts, they then stifle my ambitions and goals with their little snake brains (the liberal “don’t tread on me” class). Thankfully, my doctor is a good doctor (at least a hundred years old), so I just sat there for 99 minutes, and ran through dhikr over and over, recalibrating my heart by clicking the sacred abacus around my neck (in my hands during the process). My fuckitallism levels went down in the moment, but of course, most human structures in America are full of Yakubian screens in every direction, and it manufactures an imbalance where those levels start to rise again. I just gotta be more vigilant about having more intention with my attention. My doctor (the birch tree) told me that most cases of too high fuckitallism levels are due to Intention Deficit Disorder, which is an unnatural result of all that we’ve cultured.
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